Today Is a Rough Day

• I was up late last night finishing up grad school homework, so I didn't get to go to the book signing. It wasn't so much because of poor planning as it was that I misread the assigned readings and had to catch up. C's = F's in grad school and I can't fail this class or I'm out of grad school.
• When I finally did get to bed, I had a terrible night of sleep. Palmer woke up four times and decided that 5:30 a.m. was the best time to start the day. 
• I had to completely tear apart our room in an attempt to trap Gus, our cat, in order to make it to his vet appointment on time. 
• I took a toddler, an infant, and a yowling cat to the vet. Alone.
• I took a toddler and an infant to the grocery store. The energy it took to talk Henry down from having to have one of the Hot Wheels toys the had at the end of the aisle... and the left over Easter candy... and a random crab toy... I caved when it came to the Ranch Doritos. So my child has eaten a cake pop from Starbucks and a bag of Ranch Doritos today. Meanwhile...
• I have eaten next to nothing because of my esophagitis, which I have from the massive amounts of caffeine I drink between 5:30 a.m. and noon. I get indigestion every time I eat. The only thing that doesn't hurt to eat are carbs. So good for you, I hear.
• I am so tired.
• I haven't been on a date with my husband since September. I don't think I've had a *real* conversation with him since Saturday.
• I haven't seen or heard from some of my good friends in months. I feel terrible about it.
• My house is a wreck despite spending all my spare time folding, doing dishes, picking up toys...
• I can't believe I have to go to class tonight until 10 p.m. I was so tired last week that I drove home with the lights off. I live thirty minutes from campus.
• My sister-in-law posted a family picture from Easter. She has a three week old and looks AMAZING! Then there's me. I look like Buzz's pale-ass girlfriend. I can't even write about it.
• I am overwhelmed. 
• I spent 20 minutes scouring the house for "Blue Car" because Henry wouldn't go to sleep without it. Do you know how many blue cars Henry has? 2345. Do you know where toddlers like to put cars? Everywhere. Including down the toilet. Thankfully, the blue car he wanted was only in his car seat.
• I hate that no one told me how hard it was going to be to stay at home with two kids. I hate that even if they had told me, I wouldn't have understood.
• I haven't showered today and I now have to finish typing because it's the only chance I'm going to have to get clean before class tonight. 

What's Working

I'm no Dr. Phil fanatic, but I really love when he asks, "How's that working for you?" Sometimes it just takes asking that question to find value or fault in something that you just deal with absentmindedly. So, Dr. Phil, here's what's working:


My hair
I have had long hair for about ten years, but last month I got sick of looking at my bedraggled mop. There was just too much maintenance and not enough time, so I decided to trade in my long hair for something sleek and pulled together. A part of me worries that this is a mom cliche haircut, but my mantra lately has been "it doesn't have to work forever; it just has to work right now". This haircut takes me 15 minutes to blow dry and looks the same every time. It's a win in my book, and if I change my mind, hey, hair grows!

Now you know who to stalk.

Yoga Pants
Obvi. This is basically my uniform. I put on yoga pants, a cardigan and some ballet flats and BOOM, I'm ready. The trick is finding the perfect pants, which I have just about mastered for myself. And no, they have never been to yoga class. Who has time for that? Keep reading.

And I look exactly like this in my yoga pants.

BB Cream
I'm not one for makeup crazes. The ombre nail polish thing sets off my OCD. BB Cream happened because I ran out of moisturizer and thought it would be a great way to keep my adorable metrosexual husband away from my product. I have had more compliments on my skin in the past two months than I have since... well, I can remember. It's like a tinted moisturizer put on with an airbrush machine. It's working. Mommy rikey. Daddy no rikey.

This is the one I use. No, I am not getting paid for this endorsement, but I should.

Now for what's not working.

Sleep
Oh. My. Umm... I want to go back in time to when I was in college complaining about being tired and punch that girl in the face. And then I want to make that girl go punch another girl in the face. I was not tired. You see, Palmer, aka Puff, aka P Diddy, likes to check in with me anywhere from 3-7 times a night. Sometimes, just for shits and giggles, Henry will also wake up and as soon as I open his door, he goes back to sleep. Occasionally George, the dog, and Gus, the cat will chime in. I feel like it goes without saying that when Ryan snores, I hit him. With my pillow. Filled with bricks.

I heard somewhere that prison guards have made prisoners stay up as a form of torture. I understand. This is an effective form of torture. It makes me tired. Duh. But lack of sleep also makes me indecisive, crabby, unmotivated, and depressed, which all make me feel like a bad mom, a bad wife, and a bad friend. My birthday is next month and I'm not interested in presents. I'm interested in a hotel room to myself.

Time
Once upon a time, a 24 year old me told a friend she was planning on starting her novel when she became a mom because she would have more time on her hands. Fire up the flux capacitor on the DeLorean, boys! I'm going to go beat the shit out of myself!

"WTF, McFly. I told you to bring the Cheetos!"

I somehow got bamboozled into going back to grad school. Something about finishing my degree by this fall in order to save 24 credits and $12,000 I'd already invested in my education... Don't get me wrong, I love grad school. It's like a four hour vacation every week, but on top of my job as a full time caretaker, chef, maid, financial planner, event coordinator, professional organizer, and errand runner, it is stressing me out a *little* bit.

So there you have it. What's working or not working for you? Feel free to use my post idea and link me up to your blog. Or however that works.

Cheers!