Updates on The Children

PREGNANCY:
Weeks: 38 today... Henry was born at 38 weeks and five days. Let's hope this child is an early bird as well... but not too early. Keep reading.
Dilated: 2 cm. 8 to go. Boo-yeah!
Effaced: Still 75%
Weight: Why does every pregnant girl with a blog feel the need to brag about her weight? I weigh less than I did with Henry. Triumph.
Contractions: All the time. If we hooked my uterus up to a generator, I could probably create enough electricity for the entire District.
Nicknames: We've switched from Bug to Moose since this child is going to be enormous. I'm trying not to be annoying with the name, though, because it can get that way when you don't know the gender. My apologies to everyone who got sick of hearing me call Henry Bean during pregnancy.
Swollen: Nope. Crazy, since I couldn't wear my wedding rings the last trimester with Henry.
Sleep: Suffering from a little bit of insomnia, which is understandable seeing as though I need a forklift to turn and reposition myself, and I have to pee so much, I'm wishing I had a catheter.
Brain Power:  My IQ has probably dropped 10 points with this baby. S/he is going to be a GD genius.
Agility: I can barely move, this child is so big. I now watch those 300lb. Woman shows on TLC and I'm like, "Obviously, you are going to drive your car 20 ft. to your mailbox. That would be so painful to walk!"
Gender Predictions: Despite 9 out of 10 people's predictions that this will be a girl, I've spent the last two months thinking it's a boy, and I've kind of attached myself to the idea of having two little blond haired, blue-eyed boys wrestling with each other in the living room. More on this later.
Anxieties: Ummm... nothing really. Oh, maybe that I'm going to have this baby while Ryan is out of town this week. Oh, you know. He's in Orlando for business. Really busy...

"Working" on the golf course

"Working" at Medieval Times... with a tiara.

I don't want to talk about it.

SIR WILLIAM HENRY, I ESQ.
Bottle: Gave that up right after his second birthday in July. WIN
Big Boy Bed: Took to it like a fish to water. WIN
Potty Training: Made great progress the first day, then he got sick and was over it. FAIL
Pacifier: Two weeks without it, bia! WIN
Preschool:  Not going to lie, thought this was going to be a fail, but he's turned a leaf and started to love it. Fire Safety Week is going to seal the deal. They're bringing in a fireman and a fire truck. So, WIN
Eating: FAIL. FAIL. FAIL. Chicken nuggets and Goldfish. Add this to the list of "Things That Must Not Be Mentioned"
Growth: Henry has shot up at least an inch this past month. I know this because his pants are starting to look a little bit short. I went to Old Navy to get him some new ones today, and did you know that all their normal looking plain pants are $20. Yes, the toddler pants. Yes, the adult pants are the same price. WTF?!? And good luck trying to find a 2T. Get it together, ON. The pants aren't lined in gold. Hell, they're not even lined at all. Rant over. Henry= WIN, Old Navy= FAIL

Ok, it's almost 10 and I should be watching the debates... but I'm exhausted. I'd rather toss and turn in bed like one of those giant sea lions on the beach. Here's a visual if you need one.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1OoBJ86oqmc